1 - 20 of 3614 Works in Self-Destruction

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    All my poems, posted in mostly a chronological order of when they were written. Can serve as a journey through recovery; and the teenage years of a self-harming, socially anxious, depressive, suicidal, autistic (but doesn't really know it yet) girl - in other words: me...

     

    Not expecting much traffic for this work, just wanted to have them all in one easily-accessible place.
    Can also find all my poems on my Poetizer here:
    https://poetizer.com/author/54361
    I bear my soul in this poems: if no one reads them that's fine with me!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    80,242
    Chapters:
    436/?
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    127
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1318
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Josuke has felt a lot of things over the course of his life, but none so palpably or as often as anxiety. Anxiety over his failures, the things he lacked, the things he was, for not knowing what he should do about his future, and for wanting everything he can't have. Were he a better man he might not have reached so greedily with both hands for his own self destruction.

    Jotaro has done a lot of stupid shit in his life, lost a lot, fought to keep as much as he could, and succeeded at enough to feel like he was at least a little capable of making good decisions. But nothing could have prepared him for getting caught in Josuke's orbit.

    (A story in which Josuke and Jotaro learn the depths of their own faults, the lengths they're willing to go to be satisfied, and how those pieces fit together.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    53,443
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    30
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    347
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Wilbur frowned even more, willing to lend some help in any way he could. "Why don't you come stay with me? Just for tonight, yeah?"

    The boy shook his head once more, Wilbur pouted. "Please, buddy, I'm not forcing you. I know it's strange given that we just met, but I really want to make sure you're safe."

    The other considered it before giving up with a small nod. "Come on then!" Wilbur grinned. He extended his hand to the young man, assisting him in getting up.
    ---
    or Wilbur stumbles upon a scrawny boy, scavenging for food in a nearby ally. Not sure what to do with the poor kid, he offers to take him home.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,191
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    78
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1645
  4. Tags
    Summary

    "It is I, the Great Zevran, assaulter of forts and rescuer of wayward wardens, at your service," he said, voice filled with bravado as he took a flourishing bow. His ankles were crossed, his arms swept wide. But the cocky grin on his face did not reach his eyes. Those glittered as if he were still in the killing mood.

    Wherein the Dalish mage warden learns about resilience, and Zevran Arainai applies pointy things to bad men and wicked creatures.

    A continuation of my Dalish mage origin playthrough. For background and context, I do recommend reading the whole series in order. Manages to bemostly cannon. Updates daily.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,935
    Chapters:
    19/22
    Comments:
    108
    Kudos:
    61
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    403
  5. Tags
    Summary

    “He’s a fuckin’ dick, Steve.”

    At least, that’s what you think until you start actually talking to him instead of threatening him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,391
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    209
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Goku, luego de la muerte de Vegeta, comienza a comportarse de una manera suicida, queriendo reencontrarse en el otro mundo con ese chico que amaba.
    Pero en un intento de suicidio, asegura que fue precisamente Vegeta quien lo evitó, a pesar de saber que él ya no está con vida.
    ¿El destino los unirá?, ¿o de nuevo los separará?
    Segunda parte de Mi novio suicida.
    Goku Seme x Vegeta Uke.

    Series
    Language:
    Español
    Words:
    42,797
    Chapters:
    10/25
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    153
  7. Tags
    Summary

    When Tony invents a time machine, he doesn't think it will actually work. He also neither expects nor wants to be dragged into a century old war between a bunch of immortals, let alone into some weird caricature of a romance with one of those immortals.

    But well, here they are.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,229
    Chapters:
    2/50
    Comments:
    50
    Kudos:
    77
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    557
  8. Tags
    Summary

    “Burns?”

    He hit the fucking nail on the head, because of course he did.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,120
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    73
  9. Tags
    Summary

    A series of letters Frank writes to Gerard in a final attempt to save their failing relationship

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,519
    Chapters:
    19/31
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    20
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    401
  10. Tags
    Summary

    To love someone so hard it tears you apart and makes you want to rot is a dangerous thing. To love someone that hard when they’re hellbent on being as unlovable as possible is even more dangerous. Dream has stared at the face of surrender enough times to know what it looks like on someone else.

    He has grown desperate and desperate still, chasing after what is left of his and George’s relationship after Stanford. These days, George is only interested in chasing the end of his downwards spiral. In the end, the only surefire way for Dream to get close to George is to be a part of that spiral.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,295
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    86
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    626
  11. Tags
    Summary

    One day, the Akumas stopped. They just stopped. No final confrontation, no great breakthrough, no warning. A year after the sudden end of their secret lives, months after the argument that ended their partnership, the former heroes of Paris find themselves lost. Without their mission, who, really, are they? Chat Noir indulges dark desires to keep time marching forward, Marinette keeps returning to a destructive relationship. Things are spiraling….

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    182,926
    Chapters:
    38/?
    Comments:
    591
    Kudos:
    624
    Bookmarks:
    99
    Hits:
    25965
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Theon es un alma desordenada que ha corrido toda su vida de un lugar a otro, hasta que se encuentra con un muro en forma humana cuyo nombre es Ramsay Bolton

    Language:
    Español
    Words:
    157,473
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Comments:
    99
    Kudos:
    110
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    899
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Peter wasn’t a stranger to rejection. In fact, this was his year.

    Obligatory symbiote fic. Boy meets alien. An accompaniment to @ask-spiderpool on Tumblr!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,072
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    202
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    2649
  14. Tags
    Summary

    He doesn't feel happy being here anymore. He doesn't feel safe. Home was supposed to feel safe and warm, but why does L'manburg feel so cold now? He doesn't understand what he did wrong.

    He finds no comfort in everyone's raised expectations and requests of him, it just makes him exhausted and yearn more an escape.

    Tommy doesn't know where to go or what to do, and makes a stupid mistake.

    He visits Dream.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,609
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    1002
    Bookmarks:
    145
    Hits:
    10707
  15. Tags
    Summary

    He watches the tail lights retreat out of the parking lot, the small piece of paper still gripped between his fingers. Slowly, his head tips down. He stares at it. Upon further inspection, it’s not even paper; it’s a torn up napkin that he’s sure has been in the glovebox compartment of that car for god knows how long.

    He carefully unfolds it, staring at the messy scrawl inside.

    It’s exactly what he thought. But he’s not sure he deserves it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,534
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    80
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    493
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Hi. This is a place for me to put all the very many poems I’ve written over the years. There’s magic, there’s spirituality, there’s regret, there’s want and need and yearning. There’s pondering and wondering and wandering. It’s emotional, it’s fantastical, it’s angry, it’s hopeful, it’s mentally ill, it’s weird. But most of all it’s me screaming into the void and hoping that the void won’t scream back. But it does scream back. It always screams back.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    823
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Hits:
    12
  17. Tags
    Summary

    He wasn't sure what he was expecting at the bottom. An axe to the face, maybe. Not…this.

    Not Quackity pathetically hunched over a book in his lap, a mound of vaguely humanoid green slime attached to the wall.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    745
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    67
  18. Tags
    Summary

    "Hyunjin, what's it like being the– the… beta of stray kids," Hyunjin reads out with a slight tilt of his head.

    Comments were flying across his screen after he'd spoke. There were things like "is it fun???" and "don't you get lonely? ☹" and then the occasional "what do u do during heats ㅋㅋㅋ"

    "Well," he starts slowly, "It's– well, Seungmin-ah is a beta too, but–" he flicks his tongue against his lower teeth. "For me specifically, I think it's… nice?"

    -

    Everyone knows that suppressants are damaging for omegas to take - that forcefully hiding their given, secondary gender is something life-threatening.

    Hwang Hyunjin has been on suppressants since he was 16.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,085
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    208
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    1284
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Non ha mai domandato a Suzaku perché i suoi occhi abbiano un colore tanto peculiare, almeno per un Eleven; non si è mai neppure posto il problema. Ha sempre dato per scontato che tutto in lui avesse una funzione pratica, dal suo modo di fare rigido – soprattutto nei propri confronti – al suo registro linguistico eccessivamente formale, dal suo pragmatismo malinconico a, per l’appunto, i suoi occhi dello stesso verde cupo di un bosco privo di fonti di luce naturale.
    In quel momento però, con Suzaku che lo fissa ansimando, l’espressione contratta in una smorfia orripilata e la parola “scusa” che si è smarrita da qualche parte nel tragitto dalla sua mente alla sua bocca, non riesce a pensare ad altro. Lo sente dentro di sé, e sente le sue dita che affondano nei suoi capelli, e non riesce a pensare ad altro.

    Language:
    Italiano
    Words:
    2,933
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    19
  20. Tags
    Summary

    It’s okay, because he has it handled. He’s burning out all the impurities and he has it handled.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,354
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    235

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