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it's like destiny if it's you

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Sasuke looks at the sky, pitch-black and star-dotted. 

It’s way past midnight.

He sits with his friends—Karin, Suigetsu and Jūgo—in the garden of Jūgo’s family, a warming bonfire against the chilly night air in the middle of them. The garden is unimaginably large and passes over in a forest that’s also owned by Jūgo and his family. His parents are both foresters and he will follow in their footsteps as soon as he finishes school; taking care of nature and animals comes as natural to Jūgo as breathing. 

“Look at him,” Suigetsu snickers, tongue heavy with all the liquids that are currently flowing in his bloodstream, paralyzing his synapses. “Sasuke’s thinking again.”

“Men who actually use their brain are very attractive, maybe you should start for once and someone will finally get you laid,” Karin says, checking her fingernails, painted red like always.

Suigetsu beams at her, a hand possessively squeezing her leg, wandering higher until his fingers brush over the seam of Karin’s black skirt. “Do you want to volunteer?” 

Karin smacks him with her fist on his head but his toothy grin doesn’t waver the slightest. 

“Take your hand back or I’ll cut it off,” she warns in a cold and dangerous tone but her cheeks are tainted pink and her words lack their usual fierceness when it comes to Suigetsu—and the latter seems to know that very well.

Suigetsu leans into her. “You’re cute when you’re blushing,” he whispers and his mouth touches her ear while his hand stays where it is, rubbing her soft skin and Karin doesn’t protest further, even though her blush is deepening as she stubbornly looks into the crackling fire. 

Sasuke asks himself if she knows that every time she drinks vodka she, to put it mildly, encourages the blood flow in her face, making her skin seem as thin as rice paper. 

Sasuke locks eyes with Jūgo who only shrugs, and so they silently agree to ignore whatever is going on between Suigetsu and Karin for that night—it’s not like it’s entirely surprising, no; Sasuke very well knows about Suigetsu’s crush on Karin, it accumulated over the years of childish teasing into something more mature and… something not so innocent. 

Goodness, how many torturously long voicemails he has received about Suigetsu’s wet dreams with Karin as his main cast—it’s just obnoxious. The only thing being more despicable is Suigetsu’s behavior for the last six months everytime another male comes near Karin and even has the audacity to try and flirt with her. 

Now that he thinks about it—at the last party they all went to… Karin didn’t shout at Suigetsu or give him a black eye like she used to when someone tried to flirt with her and he wanted to stop that. No, they left with each other even though Suigetsu wanted to crash with him instead. So… that’s why Suigetsu looked so happy when they met again the day after, huh?  

It seems they haven’t really talked about what had happened between them though.

“Have you guys decided what you want to do after school?” Jūgo asks and leans back on the tree trunk he is sitting on. The bonfire colors him orange and red. 

“Something with water,” Suigetsu answers nonchalantly, shrugging his shoulders. “Maybe marine biology or something. Or a surf instructor.”

“But we haven’t an ocean—” Karin blurts, her eyes widening for a moment where she realizes she actually cares what Suigetsu does. She corrects her glasses, clearing her throat. “My decision didn’t change. I’m going to be a doctor.”

“Hot,” Suigetsu adds, smirking, and Sasuke looks away as he watches one of Suigetsu’s fingers move slightly under Karin’s skirt. He wouldn’t have thought this could get any more annoying. Well, Suigetsu is always up for surprises. 

“Fuck off, dickhead,” Karin says, her voice suspiciously trembling at the edges. 

“What about you, Sasuke?” Jūgo wants to know, zealously ignoring the sexual tension between two of his friends. 

Yeah, what about him? He hates thinking about that—thinking about the future always includes thinking about responsibilities and, inevitable, also about his father. Sasuke used to love Fugaku as a kid, even idolized him. Fugaku is a stern but loving father figure that struggles with openly showing his emotions. It comes with the job, Sasuke muses. 

“I don’t know,” Sasuke answers truthfully. “My father still wants me to join his police force but that's happening only over my dead corpse. I’m thinking about joining Itachi’s tattoo studio though, just to despise his old ass.”

“You’re certainly good enough for that,” Jūgo encourages him, smiling warmly. “I’d get my first tattoo by you.”

“Your father will kill you, won’t he?” Karin asks, crossing her legs. “He had been so disappointed with Itachi not following in his ol’ family business that he didn’t speak with him for almost half a year.”

“I don’t care what he does.”

“Does he know you don’t want to?” Suigetsu puts in, opening another beer bottle—Suigetsu will slip on all the bottles he scattered in the grass, Sasuke is sure, and break his damn neck. 

“I told him a few years back I rather wanted to do something I’m proud of instead of supporting an old, corrupted system that only benefits the majority society.”

“So you told him you want to abolish the police?” Suigetsu laughs, trying to put his arm around Karin—she pinches him hard. Too much open admiration. He lets his arm fall, his hand casually touching the side of her ass.  “Very bold of you.”

“He’d die of a heart attack if he knew,” Sasuke utters, thinking of the time when his father discovered that he read the conquest of bread by Pjotr Kropotkin. He shouted at him, and then at Itachi—who gifted the book, like many others, to Sasuke on his fifteenth birthday. Shortly after that incident Itachi moved out and opened up raven’s eye —they don’t talk about Itachi’s job whenever he visits and Fugaku’s disapproval grows with every new tattoo on Itachi’s body. 

“How old is he?”

“Fifty-four.”

“Old enough then,” Suigetsu says, shrugging. “We’re all going to die anyway in a few years because of boomer like him. So who cares? Do what you want.”

“There’s still a chance our planet will stay habitable though,” Jūgo insists. “But I agree with Suigetsu. Do as you please, it’s your life, not your father’s.” 

“Same,” Karin sympathizes.

Sasuke’s phone vibrates in his pocket.

“Tell him that, not me,” he mumbles, annoyed and grabs his phone. The light illuminating from his display burns in his eyes, so he turns it down before he can read anything—it isn't surprising that Naruto messaged him. Who else would still be awake at this hour? 

 

Usuratonkachi
last seen: 03:34 am 

hi sas! are u still @ jūgo’s? i wanted to ask u a question 🤓

You

I am.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

oh okay! then i’ll ask another time!! much fun!!

You

You can ask me anyway.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

idk if that’s a good idea actually haha
just forget what i said pls

You

Spit it out already, moron. I don’t have all day.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

oook. but first promise me you won’t be mad pls

 

Sasuke furrows his eyebrows, trying to make sense of Naruto’s gibberish. Why should he promise not to be mad? He didn’t get back that last exam already that determines if Naruto gets to graduate, did he? 

 

You

Naruto, what’s going on? 

Usuratonkachi
currently online

i need your help with smth

 

“Oh uh! He’s writing with your cousin again, Karin! Look!”

“You mean the one he’s in love with for almost a decade?” Karin wonders, her long fingernails scratching over her chin. Her red lips are stretched into a mocking grin. Suigetsu nods like a hungry hyena.

“...which is more than half of his life? Exactly, that one!”

“Yeah,” she snickers. “I think so, too. It’s his eyes that give him away.” 

“Suddenly full of life and fire.”

Sasuke groans. “Would you two stop it already? I’m not in love with him.” 

“Then why didn’t you date anybody for the last few years?” Jūgo asks honestly, tilting his head.

“It’s not like you hadn’t the chance to,” Karin adds. “People are always mooning over you.”

Sasuke shrugs. “There’s no one that caught my interest, that’s why.”

“No one can catch your interest when all your attention goes to a loudmouth with scars on his cheeks that look like whiskers—I’m sure you know who I’m talking about.”

“We see the way you look at him,” Jūgo points out, emphasizing what Suigetsu just said. 

“We’re best friends, that’s it,” Sasuke presses, looking away. He knew Naruto since they were kids and his family moved from Uzushiogakure to Konoha, next to Sasuke’s house. Their mothers met while they worked on their gardens and somehow, they befriended each other, dragging their sons along. It didn’t take long until Naruto all by himself knocked on their door and asked if Sasuke wanted to come out.

“You already kissed each other though,” Suigetsu objects.

“We were twelve!” 

It was Sasuke’s first kiss, clumsy and full of teeth. It had hurt more than it felt good, but he remembers how soft Naruto’s lips felt against his own for the split of a second, how he had tasted like miso—and how angry Sakura was because Naruto had stolen Sasuke’s first kiss, taking her place and—

and maybe after that Sasuke had a little crush on Naruto but nothing had happened ever since between them. When Naruto started to show interest in girls when they were older, talking about how plump and soft their bodies looked, Sasuke knew it had no meaning. 

“Doesn’t matter, kiss is kiss.” 

“We also kissed, Suigetsu, and yet I’m not in love with you.”

Suigetsu stiffens a little next to Karin, watches her from his peripherie because he is afraid to destroy whatever they build with each other over the last few weeks. It’s almost cute.

“You two kissed?” she asks, looking from one to another, one of her thin eyebrows peaked. “Why don’t I know about that? When?”

“Because it’s different!” Suigetsu stresses. “Sasuke and I wanted to experiment with each other, that’s all.”

“So did Naruto when he kissed me,” Sasuke says, exhaling. He downs the last bit of vodka-o he has left in his cup, welcoming the burning at the back of his throat.

His phone vibrates again.

Usuratonkachi
last seen: 03:43 am

nevermind. good night sas

 

Somehow, Sasuke’s heartbeat quickens and his hands get sweaty—he doesn’t want Naruto to go to bed without telling him. It seemed important, didn’t it? 

 

You

Suigetsu got on my nerves.
What is it?

 

He watches his display and hopes Naruto’s online status will change once more but nothing happens. When his display fades and the only light surrounding him is from the bonfire and the stars, he slides his phone back into his pants, sighing. 

He should have answered sooner. 

Then he feels the vibration once again and prays to all the gods and goddesses that it’s Naruto and not someone else, someone unimportant like Sai or Kiba.

 

Usuratonkachi
currently online

you have to promise first, remember?

Sasuke rolls his eyes, huffing. Moron.

You

I promise. Now get it over with.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

okkkk 
uuuuhm
how do i say that?

You

I’m going to block you if you don’t tell me already.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

well
uhm
do you want to take my v-card?
asjdklaawdalmnx

 

Sasuke chokes on his spit the second he reads the message, then reads it a second time, and again and again—he’s not seeing that right, right? Right? 

He fills himself another cup of alcohol and downs it; burning away the itchiness in his throat but it doesn’t help against his racing heart—whatever the others say, if they say anything at all, the bumping in his ears is so loud he doesn’t hear anything else anyway.

Naruto is a… virgin? Not—Not that this matters. 

 

You

Are you drunk?

Usuratonkachi
currently online

no!!!🙄
i’m serious sas

You

No. 

 

He types so fast because it’s the right thing to do—replying instantly if your best friend is in distress—and Naruto’s answer comes just as immediately. 

Usuratonkachi
currently online

ok ive thought so anyway it’s fine
but i’m not going to college as a virgin

You

Are you fucking with me, Naruto? 
I don’t know what to say.

 

Within another heartbeat—because this can't be happening, not really— he adds:

 

You

Is it you again, Kiba? Fuck off. This isn't funny.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

i told you i’m serious!!!!!! it’s me!!
it’s fine tho i’ll just ask someone else
goodnight then

 

Sasuke’s heart stops for a second—then his mind is flooded with pictures of Naruto, laying on his bed, naked, cheeks flushed, smiling. The second he imagines another thatch, black with lavender eyes, whose finger trace over brown, sun-kissed skin, luring soft moans from—

Fuck. 

He is not going to let that happen. 

They… they are best friends and best friends help each other out, don’t they?

 

You

Where are you?

Usuratonkachi
currently online

home. y?

You

I’m coming over. Let your window open. 

 

He doesn’t wait for an answer but shoves his smartphone back into his pants, his heart beating so fast he fears it might rip open his ribcage. He’s… he’s going to do this. Fuckfuckfuck. He’s going to do this. 

“I’m heading home,” Sasuke says, his voice wavering with the bubbling nervousness racing through his nervous system. His armpits feel damp. 

“Why so suddenly?” 

“Do you really need to ask?” Suigetsu asks Jūgo, snickering. “Fishcake needs him.”

“Naruto needs help,” Sasuke answers the same second as Suigetsu and he wants to straight up murder him. “He… he locked himself out and needs a place to crash.” 

“Liar.”

His friends laugh.

“I hope you choke on your spit and die,” Sasuke bites out. “Anyway, I’m sorry I have to go.” 

“It’s okay, Sasuke. Go help your damsel in distress,” Jūgo smiles. 

“Don’t forget the condoms, I don’t want to be an aunt yet!”  

Sasuke shows them his middle finger and turns around, hiding the blush that’s creeping up his neck, and then, as soon as they can't see him anymore, runs. 

Chapter Text

Sasuke stops in his tracks the moment he sees the big old oak standing majestically in the garden of Naruto’s family—with the big, bulky branches that lead to Naruto’s room. The window is open—and the sheer sight makes Sasuke nauseous. It is an unpleasant feeling, yet a little exciting, too—but there’s no light indicating Naruto is still awake. 

If the blonde shooed him from one end of Konoha to the other just to end up asleep already—or worse, it really was one of Kiba’s sick and stupid jokes—, he is going to kill one of them. He really is. 

Sasuke pants heavily—and makes a note to himself that, perhaps, it would be better if he worked out a little more regularly—, supporting himself with his hands on his thighs as he draws the air back into his lungs; the wind is cold but he feels so hot inside from all the running it doesn’t make any difference. 

Thank goodness Konoha is a small town. 

Due to the jogging the alcohol burned faster through his veins, he feels only slightly tipsy now. It didn’t make go away the prickling anticipation thrumming slowly but steady under his skin though. 

When they were kids Sasuke used to climb this oak on a daily basis. Today, he makes his way up the tree with sweaty hands—and with nervousness enveloping his heart and the residual alcohol clogging his mind—he prays not to fall down and break his neck. 

He usually doesn’t climb the tree anymore to visit Naruto; it’s rather a sweet childhood memory. Nowadays he simply knocks like a normal person would or, like most of the time, Naruto is already waiting for him at the door, a bright smile on his lips as he hugs him every goddamn time they see each other. Which is almost 24/7 if Sasuke isn’t with Karin and the rest, or Naruto decides to meet Kiba and his other friends; they are both not very fond of the others’ friend group.

At some point Naruto’s mother even suggested making an additional key for Sasuke to come and go as he pleases when they were sixteen, which he kindly declined—it felt somehow intrusive to be so familiar with them; although he was glad that they trusted him that much, he declined.

Today… today was different though. It felt safer to come through the window and not wake anybody up. To not leave traces. 

Still, it reminded him of the times late at night when their parents already went to sleep and Naruto asked over the walkie-talkie if he wanted to come and play videogames with him. Or watch a movie. Or just talk and laugh until their bellies hurt and their eyelids grew heavy. One time Kushina found out about their unpermitted sleepovers because they slept too long after eating the leftovers of Naruto’s birthday party—she woke Sasuke up and he thought she would be angry but she wasn’t; she just smiled knowingly and proposed that he should leave before Sasuke’s parents noticed his absence.

“Hi,” Naruto greets him, lips sheepishly turned upwards as Sasuke reaches the window and looks inside. “You didn’t need to come through there. My parents are visiting Jiraiya this weekend.” 

Naruto is sitting cross legged on his bed, wearing black shorts and one of his countless, boring, irritating orange shirts. No socks. 

“Couldn’t you have told me before I climbed my way up here?” 

“I did,” Naruto says defensively. “You just didn’t look at your phone anymore.”

“Good point,” Sasuke answers shrugging and enters Naruto’s room—the noise his feet make on the ground as he lands is unusually loud between them. The moonlight illuminates Naruto’s room, coloring everything in a warm-silvery shade, making his skin glow. His eyes are a pretty midnight blue and his honey-tinched hair looks softer than it usually does. 

Sasuke swallows. 

Now is the time for Naruto to tell him that it is all a big fucking joke. 

“Do you want to come closer?” he asks instead as Sasuke doesn’t dare to move, head tilted slightly and a lopsided smile on his lips; and Sasuke wants to say no—and yes, yes, yes, please. He nods and walks to Naruto, to his bed, not sure if he wants to break eye contact or not and comes to sit next to him, stiff and mouth dangerously dry as he gets rid of his shoes.

“You smell like alcohol,” Naruto notes, eyebrows furrowed. “You aren’t drunk, are you?”

“No,” Sasuke assures, pathetically fast. “No, I’m not. Not anymore at least.”

“I hope so.” He smiles. “Like, consent is everything, right?”

Sasuke watches the movement of his lips, the soft stretching that reveals Naruto’s white and sharp teeth—almost foxlike—and stares dumbly at the freckle above the left side of Naruto’s mouth. 

“Do you really want to…?” Sasuke starts slowly, not sure if he can do more than implying the obvious.

“Yes, I do. I am sure. Don’t worry.” 

Naruto licks his lips and Sasuke’s eyes are stitched to Naruto’s pink tongue, he swallows but there’s no spit, his own tongue feeling like sandpaper. “I actually thought about it all day—we’re graduating next month, y’know? Time’s running for me—and when I messaged you, I didn’t think you’d answer so soon because it’s already so late…” 

There is a small pause in which Naruto laughs self-consciously, scratching the back of his head as he purses his lips. 

“...but here we are, I guess. Doing it .”

“And you didn’t do that before?”

“No,” Naruto smiles dumbly. “You were my first kiss, now you’re going to be my first—uh, well—everything.”

Sasuke almost chokes at that. Naruto can’t just throw things like this around and—how—how—

“Do you want to be the active or passive part?” Sasuke asks like on autopilot, words just senselessly falling from his teeth over his mouth, spilling between them as his mind races against his heart. His fingertips feel like lightning ready to strike. 

“I’ll—uhm, I’ll bottom if that’s okay with you.” 

Naruto fumbles with his fingers and his cheeks turn red but he doesn’t look away, his gaze is steady and serious.

Sasuke feels himself grow hard through his pants. 

“Yeah,” he breathes and reckons this has to be a dream—he’s at Suigetsu’s, totally plastered and fast asleep. It’s just one of his many fantasies including a blond thatch and blue eyes he will deny when he is awake. 

Naruto chews at his lip, thinking, and seconds feel like years. 

Maybe he is already starting to regret that he asked Sasuke and not the Hyūga girl with her long, black hair, pretty lavender eyes and her womanly body, soft and thick and so different to Sasuke’s. He is sure she would throw herself at him if she knew. 

Because this… this is a bad idea. He can’t believe he is so dumb, taking the chance to sleep with his best friend because the ladder thinks there is meaning behind a social construct that indicates someone’s worth based on whether someone already has had sex or not. 

“Nar—”

“I want you to kiss me.” Naruto says then though, head tilted and voice firm and filled with thrilling excitement. “Will you?”

Sasuke stares at his gorgeous best friend, ruffled hair and pleading eyes—then nods, relief pooling in his stomach. 

When Sasuke dares to move just slightly into Naruto’s direction, it’s like he sets something between them into motion, and he’s drawn to Naruto like matter is drawn into a supernova, irreversible and relentless. 

The moment one of his fingers brushes over the heated skin of Naruto’s naked thigh, he knows it’s over. 

There is no stopping until Naruto tells him to do so.

The blonde impatiently drags him towards himself, and the next moment Sasuke blinks, their lips meet and Naruto’s hand cusps his own as Sasuke softly squeezes his thigh. Simultaneously, Naruto slightly opens his mouth, hot breath fawning over teeth as his tongue carefully dances over Sasuke’s upper lip. 

Naruto doesn’t taste like miso this time but mint—and then it dawns on him that Naruto probably brushed his teeth just before Sasuke came over, knowing what they were about to do. 

Fuck, he should have thought about getting chewing gums at least. He’s sure Naruto can taste the alcohol—

“W—Wait,” Sasuke breathes, head dizzy and hands heavy on Naruto’s body like gravitation is pulling them together. “Shouldn’t I brush my teeth first?”

Naruto shakes his head, cheeks covered in deep crimson. 

Sasuke wants to kiss them. 

“No, I don’t mind. Stay.” He adds: “And kiss me again.” 

Sasuke can only obliege.

“Okay,” he mumbles breathlessly as Naruto’s hand finds its way to his neck and then moves them gently back into the mattress until Sasuke lies between Naruto’s legs, chest to chest, mouth on mouth. He can feel Naruto’s arousal pressing against his stomach, a shiver running down his back. 

Naruto isn’t shy—his other hand slips under Sasuke’s shirt before Sasuke is bold enough to do even remotely the same, exploring every spot with his soft fingertips. He can feel how Naruto brushes over every rip, over the pit of his backbone, rubbing, teasing. 

Sasuke licks over Naruto’s lip, over that swollen, wet mouth he just kissed, and softly presses their hips together, drawing a soft moan from the blonde as their erections meet—Naruto exhales through his nostrils and closes his eyes, turning his head to the side, presenting his pretty, unmarked throat to Sasuke. 

“Tell me if you don’t like something I do,” Sasuke whispers, voice raw and low. He wants Naruto to have a good time, wants this to be something Naruto would look forward to do again—if he wasn’t heterosexual or if Sasuke wasn’t a man, that is.

The blonde hums quietly as Sasuke’s lips press on the warm skin, licking and sucking until Naruto’s moans get louder, ringing in Sasuke’s ear like an addicting lullaby. He feels only satisfied when he is sure to leave dark marks on sun-kissed skin that will stay for a few days, when all of this is going to be nothing more than fuel for Sasuke’s fantasies, probably for years.

Naruto’s hand slides into Sasuke’s pants, right into his briefs, squeezing his right ass cheek. In response, Sasuke bites down on Naruto’s neck and inhales his smell, strong traces of orange and pine flooding Sasuke’s senses. 

The blonde sighs deeply. “Get your shirt off.”  

Sasuke leans back, maybe a little reluctant, and throws his t-shirt mindlessly somewhere into the room. Naruto’s gaze dances slowly over his torso, drinking every detail in and Sasuke almost chokes on all of the desire mirrored in Naruto’s blue eyes that is directed at him and no one else. 

“Now you,” Sasuke demands like a child asking for sweets and Naruto’s gaze shoots up, eyelids heavy. 

He gets rid of his shirt painfully slow, making a show out of it, and Sasuke grabs his waist as soon as the black swirl on Naruto’s stomach gets visible—Itachi tattooed it on Naruto’s eighteenth birthday, much to Kushina and Minato’s disapproval. He licks over it, and takes his time, teasing, punishing, dipping the tip of his tongue into the blonde’s navel. 

“Sasuke,” Naruto moans, hips thrusting up desperately, and Sasuke stitches that moment into his memory, “Let’s take off the rest of our clothes.” 

“Impatient little thing,” Sasuke whispers with a mocking smile but there is no real bite behind it. He kisses Naruto’s stomach before retreating to open his own pants, heartbeat loudly throbbing in his head as he undresses himself. Blue eyes are fascinated by every inch of skin that gets visible, that will be touched, kissed and worshipped. 

Even though Sasuke is so heavenly aroused and Naruto seems just as eager, he stops for a moment when his finger brushes over his briefs’ seam. He’s… he’s going to sleep with Naruto in a few moments, isn’t he? That’s…

Suddenly he thinks about how and if this will change their friendship forever but he locks that thought far, far away and steps out of his underwear. 

“You look… good,” Naruto breathes, mouth agape and hunger in his eyes. “Very good.” 

“I…You…thanks,” Sasuke mutters, his cock twitching under Naruto’s attention. “Your turn.” 

Naruto nods, licking his bruised lips and gets rid of all of his clothing with one swift motion. He’s just as hard as Sasuke—already leaking a little precome, shiny and gorgeous. Sasuke wants to taste it.

“Lie down,” he orders and watches keenly as Naruto follows his words, propping himself on his elbows, his chest rhythmically heaving.

Sasuke kisses a soft trail from Naruto’s lips over his shoulders, his stomach and his thighs to the spot where his legs pass over to his crotch. Naruto is not shaved, the smell rich and infatuating. 

“Do you…?” Naruto is short of air as Sasuke breathes hot puffs against his arousal.

“Do you want me to?” Sasuke asks instead of giving an answer, watching how the red, swollen tip releases another drip of precome.

Naruto nods eagerly, closing his eyes. “Y—Yes, please.”

Sasuke kisses it gently; which claims a sharp inhale from Naruto, his finger trailing into Sasuke’s dark hair, massaging his head. Then he licks over his shaft, slowly, feeling Naruto’s fingernail scratch over his scalp. Naruto’s groan is low and stretched, and it makes Sasuke’s cock twitch even more, demanding attention. 

He dips his tongue in the slit and tastes the salty bitterness, enveloping Naruto with his mouth—

“This feels so good, Sasuke. Fuck .”  

Sasuke hums against Naruto’s cock, pinning down his restless hips on the mattress as he rubs over the tip with his tongue. He glances up to look at Naruto’s face, just to find Naruto’s hazed eyes already fixated on him, one arm thrown over his slightly sticky head, smiling softly. 

Sasuke feels strangely spurred on by this, takes the blonde’s length into his mouth and sucks, creating a vacuum he knows feels incredibly good, sliding up and down.

“S—aah—Sasuke,” Naruto moans, caressing his cheek tenderly. He takes a breath, gathering all his strength before he speaks again. “Stop. I don’t want to come before we… ” 

Disappointed but thrilled at the same time, Sasuke backs away, crawling his way up to Naruto’s face. He kisses him deeply; at first Naruto seems a little reluctant about tasting himself, but when their tongues start a lazy fight about dominance, he relaxes and presses their hips closer. 

Sasuke groans quietly into Naruto’s mouth as their erections rub against each other.

“Where’s the lube?” he whispers against Naruto’s lips, getting heated up and impatient. 

“In my drawer, just wait a sec,” Naruto answers just as quietly and turns slightly, arm reaching out to open said drawer without breaking eye contact. He grabs a bottle and hands it over to Sasuke, followed by a little plastic square—the condom. 

Sasuke opens it with his teeth, and pumps his sensitive cock twice before rolling it over. 

“That was fucking hot,” Naruto gasps, eyes blown wide and a grin on his lips. “Like it’s in a movie or something.”

Sasuke perches an eyebrow, amused. “You mean a porno?”

“Watching them is only healthy, Sasuke,” Naruto deadpans and sticks his tongue out. “I highly suggest you try it. It’s amazing.”

“Moron,” Sasuke says, sneering, as he opens the lube and gets the lubrication on his fingers—it’s cold, so he warms it up a little before positioning himself over Naruto again. His heart is beating fast and bold inside his chest, yet he feels untypically calm. It’s the way Naruto has always made him feel and—

“I’ll start with one finger,” Sasuke prompts, the back of his hand brushing Naruto’s ass as his fingers wander to his hole. “And then add another, and another until it feels good.” 

Naruto pouts, looking away embarrassed somewhere into his room. “I’m not prudish, Sasuke, I’ve touched myself there.” 

Sasuke slides one slick finger inside, nipping on his earlobe. 

“So when you fingered yourself,” Sasuke purrs, feeling brave and confident, bending his finger softly. “Did you think of someone else touching you?”

Naruto nods, moaning. 

It isn’t enough. Sasuke knows it should be, he should be grateful to touch Naruto the way he does right now but he needs to know— 

“I didn’t hear you the first time, Naruto,” Sasuke says, sliding his finger in and out until he can add another. “What did you say?”

“Yeah,” Naruto breathes, hands all over Sasuke’s body. 

“Tell me who” Sasuke demands, voice dark and raspy, letting another finger join, stretching him open until he’s ready for—

“You… ha—I think about you—”

It stings. Sasuke knew it would the second he intended to ask. It’s a lie, part of the game they are playing. It still sends hot lightning through his veins though. 

“Do you want me now, Naruto?” The question is spoken calmly—nothing compared to the storm inside Sasuke's mind. 

“God, yes, please—” 

“Very well,” Sasuke says, voice thick with desire as he withdraws his fingers. Naruto gasps at the loss. “How do you want us to do it?” 

“Can we—just—uhm—can we do it missionary style? I want—” Naruto stops. 

“You want what?” 

Naruto bites the inner side of his cheek, flushing. “I want you to be as close as possible and hold me.”

“Okay,” Sasuke agrees breathlessly and positions himself. “Spread your legs a little wider and if it hurts, tell me.” 

Naruto nods silently as Sasuke covers himself with more lube, blue eyes glued to his hands moving over his dick. 

Sasuke kisses his nose and then slowly presses his cock to Naruto's tight, hot hole—Naruto inhales sharply, probably because it feels a little cold at first, and tenses. 

“Kiss me,” Sasuke says to distract him, panting and desperate, as he shoves himself carefully inside, breathing against the sensitive, maltreated skin of Naruto's throat. 

Naruto's hand cups his chin, pulling his face higher until their lips meet into a deep, wet kiss that makes obscene noises. Naruto gasps into his mouth every time Sasuke reaches a little deeper, and Sasuke drinks those sounds hungrily down. 

When he buries himself completely in Naruto, he halts and concentrates on the way Naruto lets him feel, how he wonderfully clenches around him.

“Sasuke,” Naruto groans directly into Sasuke's ear and he thinks he might come right on the spot. “... feels so good. You inside me feels so fucking good.” 

Naruto crosses his arms around Sasuke's neck and his feet dig into his ass, pulling him closer just the same. Sasuke is surrounded by Naruto—his warmth, his touches, his kisses, his taste and smell clogging Sasuke's mind more than any drug ever could. 

The heat pooling in the midst of his stomach, pumping electricity through his body, gets more intense as he steadily picks up a rhythm—he pulls almost completely out again—just to thrust forward, this time with a little more force than before. 

“...ahh—ha—harder, Sasuke—” 

“Give me—haa—give me your hands,” Sasuke gasps, sweet, sweet need cracking the edges of his voice. 

Naruto follows without hesitation; and Sasuke grabs his hands, enveloping them both with one of his own, pulling them above Naruto's head. 

They look each other in the eyes, deeply and unyielding, as Sasuke speeds up, thrusting into him. 

Naruto gets louder, face flushed a deep, beautiful red, but he doesn’t think a second about averting his gaze and Sasuke thinks he is slowly, maddeningly losing his mind at the needy sounds Naruto makes.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” Sasuke asks, grinning as Naruto's next moan stretches, getting low and raspy. 

Naruto tries to get control of his hands back but Sasuke forces him to stay in place by pressing their hands stronger into the mattress. Naruto looks away now, embarrassed by the demand itself, but Sasuke can feel him getting tighter with every second he can’t free himself.

“Answer me.” 

“It… amazing—ha—it feels perfect, don't sto—ahh—don't stop, Sasuke.”

“I won't,” Sasuke whispers, stealing a kiss from Naruto's plump lips and pounding harder into him, feeling himself climax. “I promise I won't stop.”

Sasuke's unoccupied hand wraps around Naruto's cock, pumping him with the same speed he buries himself into Naruto, drawing louder noises from their tongues. 

“I'm—I'm going.... fuck —I’m going to—haa—come.”

“Good,” Sasuke growls, kissing Naruto, sucking on his lip and biting into it. 

He can feel Naruto tense in the best way possible as he clenches down around him, that hot, tight, slick mess—

They come with each others' names dripping from their lips, breathing heavily as they ride out the last bits of their orgasms, tangled together. 

Naruto kisses him again, chaste and lazily. Sasuke's heart feels heavy already. He thinks it isn’t fair. 

“I'm glad you were my first,” Naruto says quietly, voice drenched with honesty and something else—something Sasuke can't quite pinpoint as Naruto’s fingers brush through black hair. 

The blonde yawns. 

“You sure you aren't falling asleep in a second?” 

“I won't promise anything,” Naruto laughs, wiggling his eyebrows. Then the next yawn hits him. 

“I'm going to pull out now,” Sasuke warns, coldness seeking into his bones. It's already getting morning again, the birds are chirping outside the window and Sasuke feels tired, tired and empty as the sun crawls over the sky, tinching everything in bittersweet reality. 

“Okay,” Naruto pouts, pressing his mouth one last time onto Sasuke's. 

So Sasuke leaves the warmth of Naruto's body, rolls away and stands up, getting rid of the condom and searches for his clothes. 

“Aren't you tired at all?” Naruto asks as he snuggles into his blanket, blinking drowsily. 

“Of course I am,” Sasuke mumbles as he pulls his t-shirt over—but where are his damn boxershorts? 

“Don't—don't you want to stay the night?” 

Sasuke shakes his head, sighing. He’s not going to survive this if he wakes up next to Naruto, knowing he won’t be able to touch him like this again. “I don't think that's a good idea.”

Naruto looks disappointed, maybe even a little shocked. He frowns.

“What—uhm—okay. If you say so.”

“Goodnight, Naruto,” Sasuke mutters as he puts on his pants, and doesn't care for his shoes to tie as he walks barefoot to Naruto’s room door—it would feel like betrayal to go through the window now. 

“Wait! Let me walk you to the door—”

“Don’t,” he bites out, and feels sorry. “It’s—It’s not necessary. It’s not like I would get lost, right? You should rest anyway. Goodnight.”

“I... “ Naruto starts, voice hollow and uncertain. “Okay. Whatever you say, Sasuke. See you later.” 

Sasuke closes the door behind him, not turning around, and feels anger clawing its way up synced to his beating heart—

he’s fucked he’s fucked he’s fucked

Chapter Text

Everything is—good. Great. Amazing.

They are back to being friends—normal, ordinary friends who don’t miss the others’ warmth when they go to bed; who don’t wake up with wet boxers in the middle of the night because they dreamed about the other desperately sucking their dick again; who don’t wake up in the morning, alone, the phantom touch of the others’ lips still on their mouth, no.

It’s just fucking perfect.

Like the night two weeks ago didn’t happen at all. 

To be honest, it’s what Sasuke thought as he woke up in his bed at three pm that day, feeling cold, a merciless heachache thrumming in his head. A dream. It had to be a dream. There was no way it could have happened. Well, Sasuke’s view changed when he saw himself in the mirror after he went into the shower—covered in hickeys and bite marks. 

That… involuntarily lit some hope in him—which was crushed only two days later when he met Naruto again who acted like nothing happened—even though Sasuke could clearly see the marks he had left on sunkissed skin. Obviously Naruto didn’t want to talk about it, so Sasuke didn’t say anything either. 

Friends.

Being Naruto’s friend is so—great. Best friend. Only best friend.

Sasuke knows he should be thankful to be a part of Naruto’s life, all the more now that they have crossed the bridge of having slept with each other; he knows too many stories of friendships that broke not very soon after. He doesn’t want that to happen. So he says nothing, does nothing, feels nothing (liar) and tries to convince himself he doesn’t know how Naruto looks when his iris’s dilate, black devouring almost everything of the ocean in his eyes—

Sasuke exhales deeply, stops his thoughts midtrack and turns his attention back to the TV.

They are in Naruto’s bed, watching some random horror movie—which is also very bad, very cliché—like they do almost every weekend since they have turned twelve and obsessed over Blair Witch Project

Naruto used to be so easily frightened—he didn’t sleep alone for weeks after they discovered the website that seemed to prove the events happening in the movie were real, interviewing the actors’ parents and all. They needed to always hold hands when they watched a scary movie after that, sometimes Naruto would even hide his face in Sasuke’s chest and Sasuke would feel good and strangely proud—

until Kiba commented on it, saying Naruto had to man up and Sasuke almost killed him for that. 

Maybe he really should have—

Stop. Stopstopstopstop—

Naruto—Naruto is—he—

Sasuke feels soft fingertips smooth over the bare skin of his stomach, immediately emitting crackling flames under their touch. He hasn’t noticed when and how Naruto has moved closer and he isn’t sure what the blonde has in mind, so he stays still, feigning to watch what is going on on the TV with a heart beating its way out of his ribcage.

Soon it's not only his fingers playing with the hem of his pants; Naruto’s lips brush over his throat too, pressing gentle kisses onto the nook of his neck. He can’t help himself when he tilts his head, giving Naruto more space to touch him. The blonde chuckles quietly, and Sasuke shivers when his hot breath fawns over pale skin, followed by Naruto’s tongue and teeth working on him. 

The marks Naruto will leave behind will be visible for others but somehow, he doesn’t find himself minding that at all.

He probably should stop him, he probably should care at all—

Instead Sasuke presses Naruto’s face closer, encouraging him to bite down again and again and again, just so the blonde will caress the same spot with his tongue the next second, making Sasuke gasp. He feels dizzy, drunk, when their lips finally meet into a slow, promising kiss and suddenly Naruto is all over him, sitting on his lap with tangled fingers and tongues.

Naruto doesn’t even try to hide how hard he is, not when he impatiently presses their hips together, desperate for any friction, moaning sinfully into Sasuke’s mouth. He does love the taste of desire it leaves on his tongue—

and when Naruto pulls requestingly on his pants, their shirts long abandoned somewhere between the soft kisses and the teasing bites, Sasuke muffles the part inside of him that is still uncertain and afraid what will happen if they continue like this. 

That… is something to think about later.

Now he wants to hear his own name dripping from Naruto’s lips like honey, addicted and obsessed that he is. 

“I wanna ride you,” Naruto whispers against his lips, a sweet promise that leaves Sasuke shattered and trembling with anticipation. “Do you want me to?”

It’s—fuck, he knows—he knows he should stop Naruto right now—or run away and save the last bit of his dignitiy—

Sasuke nods.

The smile Naruto gives him in return leaves him breathless.

Naruto takes one of the condoms from his drawer and gives it to Sasuke, as well as the lube, and Sasuke blissfully follows the silent demand—rolling the condom over his erection in one swift motion and applying a huge portion of the gel on it.

What he doesn’t expect is Naruto to crawl back on his lap, eagerly positioning over Sasuke’s throbbing cock—

“Don’t,” Sasuke croaks out, voice raw from desire. “You need preparation or else you’ll hurt when we—”

Naruto grins lopsidedly, lazily,  flushed cheeks deepening into a rich red. “Don’t worry, I’ve—let’s just say I took care of myself before you came, okay?”

Sasuke’s mind screeches to a halt thinking of the implication that comes with Naruto’s words. Has… has he planned for them to have sex again when he asked Sasuke to come over tonight? Does this mean—

Fuck,” Sasuke pants as Naruto starts to sit down without further warning, taking him in slowly, curiously, his hands stroking erraticly over Sasuke’s stomach and chest, to his arms and then Naruto grabs his hands, pulling them towards himself.

“Touch me, please,” he breathes and Sasuke almost chokes when Naruto buries his face into his hand, closing his half lidded eyes, smiling while he bulges his hips delicately for the first time. 

Sasuke moans, watching the way his own fingers brush over Naruto’s scars, feeling that petite rising of skin—and silently thinks to himself how beautiful Naruto looks in that moment, honey-colored hair slightly sticking to his forehead, flushed face, eyes closed and parted, swollen lips. 

With Naruto’s movements getting bolder, faster, Sasuke’s hands wander over his body to his waist, grabbing him roughly to support his erratic bouncing on Sasuke’s cock. He hopes there will be lasting proof of what they do, so everyone will see that Naruto is his and his alone and—

and he shouldn’t be thinking this.

Gasping, Naruto leans forward and presses his lips to Sasuke’s, opens his mouth and sucks on his bottom lip, hands getting lost in Sasuke’s hair. He contentedly exhales through his nostrils.

 In this angle, Sasuke begins to raise Naruto’s ass, high enough to threaten to slide out and leave him wet and needy but instead Sasuke drags him deep down again, until he is buried completely in Naruto’s hot, clenching muscle—and then does the same again, and again, and again.

It doesn’t take long after that until they both come heavily panting, almost at the same time. Naruto breathes his name directly into his ear again when it happens, and Sasuke thinks that this is going to be a new kink for him, definitely. 

Naruto lets himself drop to Sasuke’s chest, right into the sticky, warm mess he has left behind, arms curling around Sasuke’s neck, snuggling closer. Sasuke can feel his satisfied smile breaking against his skin. 

Sasuke hasn’t pulled out, yet he feels the uneasiness slowly return into his consciousness, like a thousand needles stabbing him at once—he has done it again. They have slept with each other again. Fuck.

He swallows, and Naruto idly fondles his head. 

“We need to clean ourselves,” Sasuke utters huskily, eyes draped on the TV screen, black and inactive. “Get up.”

Naruto kisses his jaw, chuckling. “How can you think of that already, asshole?” 

Sasuke props himself on his elbows, forcing Naruto to back away a little. “I’ve to go.” 

“Why?” Naruto frowns at him, sounding offended. “I wanted to order some pizza for us—and I thought you’d stay overnight. You—you already left the other time. It's… we could shower together and then watch another movie while we wait for the food to arrive—”

Sasuke shakes his head, throat chokingly tight.

“Itachi needs my help,” he lies because he doesn’t know what else to do.

“Can’t—can’t that wait until tomorrow? I’ll apologize to him if you want me to.” 

“No,” Sasuke says, emphasizing what he doesn’t really feel. “It can’t wait. Let me go, Naruto.” 

“Do you want to come back after you guys are done?” Naruto asks instead, innocent hope wrapped into his voice as he stands up, biting his lips as he lets Sasuke slide out of him.  “I could wait for you. I—I wouldn't mind. At all.” 

“I won't be home until tomorrow,” Sasuke insists, voice aloof and cold, looking away from Naruto’s pleading eyes. 

“O,” Naruto mouths, blinking. Voice dropping with disappointment weighing it down. “Well, then maybe another time.” 

“Yeah, maybe.”


Sasuke stares at the ceiling in his room, deep in thought; he isn’t fixating on any specific point in that darkness and the stars are the only ones watching back, knowing—it’s past midnight on a Tuesday morning but he came home only a few minutes ago, adrenaline still rushing through his blood like fading thunderstorms, flaring up again every time his thoughts wander back to what they just did. Does he need to say it? Again .

He can’t forget about it, his body won’t let him; the slight burn in his ass is a constant reminder of how Naruto felt inside of him, how soft-edged he gets as soon as sun kissed fingertips find their way under Sasuke’s clothes, squeezing, scratching, stroking.

And they always do, one way or another.

Sometimes while playing a video game or watching a movie, sitting comfortably close, their knees innocently touching, and Sasuke would watch Naruto slowly getting distracted, bright eyes lingering on Sasuke’s lips more often than not. After that, it usually doesn’t take long until Naruto eventually leans in to kiss him and they wouldn’t stop until they were naked and satisfied.

The anticipation itches deep under his skin whenever they see each other now, leaving Sasuke half hard and yearning when he catches Naruto already looking at him, quietly, with undeniable hunger in his eyes.

On some nights they don’t even need the silly excuse of friendship to fuck. Naruto sends one little message (i want you to come over) that will leave Sasuke with blood boiling in his veins and tight pants—he will try to stay away nonetheless, for the sake of what they had before—and his own sanity; but the prickling under his skin will get so overwhelming eventually, he takes his keys and crawls through Naruto’s window like the fucking coward that he is.

Naruto’s lips will crush into his before his feet touch solid ground. They will be half naked the moment Sasuke feels the bed frame pressing into the back of his calves. Naruto’s long fingers are already on his pulsing cock, pumping roughly, the way he knows Sasuke likes it best. 

The only rule he managed to maintain over the last few months is to flee from Naruto’s goddamn smile and his own overspilling feelings that make him dizzy and nauseous both in a good and bad way, that let him hope there is more between them than just sex, as soon as they are saturated and no longer high on endorphines. 

Sasuke is weak, weak and foolish, he knows that. 

He knows what the nervousness conquering his mind and his quickening heartbeat means whenever he thinks about Naruto—and the blonde is usually always somewhere on his mind these days—when the sun shines on his face early in the morning, when the moon illuminates the darkness in his room, always. 

And he also knows that it’s just a little uncomplicated fun—a handy extension of their friendship—for Naruto. 

He doesn’t blame him.

It hurts nonetheless.

(Fool.)

Naruto made that more than clear again today, when Sasuke allowed himself a few moments more to linger in Naruto’s arms, breathing in that rich, relaxing smell of his skin: 

(“What am I to you?” Sasuke asks against Naruto’s throat, still a bit breathless, lips brushing over one of the hickeys he has marked him with. His fingers scratch tenderly over Naruto’s hip bone. 

Sasuke feels the slight tensing of Naruto, the arm that lazily strokes Sasuke’s lower back unwittingly pushing them closer to each other. 

“You’re... my best friend,” Naruto says, a bit confused but confident.

Sasuke bites his lip, fingernails digging into Naruto’s waist. Naruto can't be such a big moron, can he? 

He props himself up on his right arm and looks Naruto in the eyes—those bright blue eyes that were the reason for his undoing in the first place. 

“What exactly does friend mean to you?” he presses. 

Naruto doesn't answer immediately and with each second more and more anger pools in the bottom of Sasuke’s stomach—

“I’m not good with words,” Naruto finally says, scratching his head and looking away. A blush coloring his cheeks then. “I… It’s just—how do I say that?”

“Probably with words, idiot,” Sasuke sasses, swallowing down the urge to punch Naruto in the face for ducking away; trying to ignore the irony of their situation: two best friends who lie in bed together—naked and bruised because they have sex regularly, goddamn it!

“I don’t know,” Naruto admits quietly, face burning. “I… I just know I really, really like touching you and having you in my arms—”

“Whatever,” Sasuke interrupts him, snapping, as he chokes on blinding rage and stinging embarrassment. They are friends with benefits. Nothing more, nothing less. Naruto is probably just experimenting with him anyway until he finds a pretty girl that would suck his dick and make him happy. “I’m going home.”

“You know you don’t have to go—” Naruto sputters agitatedly, sitting up as Sasuke jumps on his feet, searching for his clothes scattered in that goddamn room. Why couldn’t they have lit some fucking candles or something?! “I’d rather you stay with me.” 

“And I’d rather you shut up for once, usuratonkachi,” Sasuke grits out while throwing on his pullover—or is it Naruto’s, for fuck’s sake? He doesn’t care, he’ll give it back next time. The anger is clogging his mind like dense, murky smoke that comes from the ferocious fire burning in his veins.

He doesn't notice that Naruto gets up and follows him until a hand is wrapped around his wrist, turning him around. 

“What’s gotten into you?” Naruto hisses, moonlight emitting his dumb beautiful face and the rest of his body—still naked and full of bite marks and bruises Sasuke left on Naruto’s skin. Sasuke wants to either bite his face off or smooth over his furrowed eyebrows, anger doesn’t suit him—

“Nothing!” Sasuke shouts and tries to shake off Naruto’s hand but he won't let him, only grabs a little tighter. “Absolutely nothing. Now let me go!”

Naruto’s eyes turn into a raging storm on the sea. 

His grip begins to hurt. 

“What’s so wrong with staying the night after we make love!”

Everything!” Sasuke explodes, yanking furiously to get free from Naruto’s touch. “We’re not some goddamn lovers, Naruto! We never will be!” 

Naruto retrieves his hand like he burned himself, and his eyes—his eyes

Sasuke feels like he drowns by looking at them, water breaking through his resolve, filling his veins, his lungs, his heart, threatening to rip them open and bury him at the bottom of the sea. 

He needs to go or else—

“Goodnight, friend,” Sasuke taunts poisonously, storming out, running away.

Naruto doesn't follow him that time.)


Usuratonkachi
last seen: 01:43 am

hinata confessed to me today

Sasuke stares at the message. 

And stares.

And stares.

It doesn’t vanish. 

It’s still there when he unlocks his phone that went dark from inactivity.

There is a high piping echoing in his head, making it hard to grab a thought that isn’t You knew, you knew, you knew it all along that this would happen sooner or later

 Sasuke closes his eyes, inhaling deeply, holding the air for seconds until he releases it through his nose. It doesn’t ease the stinging in his chest. 

He hates himself for hoping even the tiniest bit the sex meant more than just convenient experience for Naruto even if he knew better. Over the past few weeks they evolved into fuckbuddies, friends with benefits if Sasuke wanted to put it more… mildly, they were best friends for years after all. No romantic feelings involved, no unnecessary attachments needed. 

 

You

Great.

Usuratonkachi
currently online

you think so?

You

Of course. That’s what you always wanted, isn’t it?
Too bad you gave your virginity away so easily, she would have died for it. 

Usuratonkachi
currently online

i don’t regret it
sasuke
can i call you?

You

Go call your girlfriend, I’m busy. 

Usuratonkachi
currently online

she’s not my girlfriend!!!!
what’s your problem???

You

There’s no problem. I simply have better things to do than talk to you.

 

He knows he isn’t playing fair—Naruto never promised him anything when he suggested having sex with each other. It’s just that with touching Naruto like no one else did before, over and over again, it started to get difficult to ignore the way his heart misses a beat every time Naruto comes close, even dares to kiss him. Or how his hands get sweaty and he can feel the damn butterflies in his stomach whenever Naruto calls him, asking to come over—

It would have been okay, really. He could have lived with his unrequited crush if it had stayed a one time fling. A little mistake, easily assessable. But now Sasuke craves for Naruto’s hands on him, for their mingled breaths and the way he makes him feel when he thrusts into him.

His phone vibrates again, indicating another message comes in. 

Usuratonkachi
currently online

you’re a fucking idiot

 

He blocks Naruto's number.