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Revue Starlight Incorrect Quote Book

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Hikari : Futaba, are you free on Saturday? Like around 7 PM?

Futaba : Yep.

Hikari : How about you

Kaoruko : That is no concern of yours

Futaba : Kaoruko, be nice

Kaoruko : Yes I am. Why?

Hikari : Because I'm not. You two go out without me and enjoy the date

Kaoruko : I do NOT need your help in this!

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Yuyuko : Alternatively, I could be like Tamao-senpai. All chill and mature.

Yuyuko : But I chose not to.

Rui : Why?

Yuyuko : not with you occupying my fucking seat

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Aruru : What's friend with benefit?

Tsukasa : Um, a very special type of friend?

Aruru : Oh, so like me and Misora?

Tsukasa : *chokes*

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Meifan : There are seven chairs and ten Fumi-sans. What do you do?

Akira : Bring in three more chairs.

Shiori : Why are there ten onee-chans?

Yachiyo : kill them all

Michiru : Except for Shiori, stay after dinner.

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Tonopii : Hey if I ask you a boy question, will you promise not to be weird?

TsumuTsumu : I promise.

Tonopii : So there's this guy at work-

TsumuTsumu : You can do better.

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Nana : Where there is a smoke, there is a fire.

Nana : And were there is fire, there is probably Maya-chan

Nana :

Nana : and me, burning your house.

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Fumi, who just arrived home : Hello, people who do not live here.

Yuyuko : heyyy

Rui : hello

Ichie : Yo!

Fumi : I gave you the key for emergencies.

Ichie : We were out of ramen.

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Lalafin : I'm off to practice

Shizuha : Forgetting something?

Lalafin : Ah yes! *kisses Shizuha gently on the cheek*

Shizuha : [blushing] I meant your wallet but thank you

Tsukasa, watching : Disgusting.

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Michiru : On how many legs do mice walk?

Akira : Four?

Michiru : Good. Which mouse walks on two?

Akira : What? How am I supposed to know?

Michiru : Mickey Mouse. Now which duck walks on two legs?

Akira : Donald Duck!

Michiru : WRONG! All ducks walk on two legs, you uncultured Frau Platin.

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Ayasa : hey can you ask Teru if she likes me

Hinahina : you guys are married

Ayasa : yeah but can you-

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Mahiru : That was quite a successful shopping trip!

Junna : *freaking out* We accidently left Karen and Kagura-san at the store!

Mahiru : As I said. Successful.

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Tamao : Rui-chan can you do me a favour?

Rui : I would die for you but okay continue.

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Tsukasa : You want some leftovers?

Misora : What's that?

Tsukasa : You've never had leftovers?

Misora : No, because I'm not a quitter.

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Shiori : Are you sure this is how you ask someone out?

Yachiyo : yep

Shiori : Yukishiro-senpai, will you be the top to my bottom?

Akira : *chokes*

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Kudoharu : We're so in sync that we finish each other's-

Aiai : sentences.

Kudoharu : Don't interrupt me.

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Claudine : There is one thing worse than dying!

[tears off paper revealing Maya dying]

Claudine : boom

Karen : [gasping] Tendou-san

Claudine : NO

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Fumi : There is one thing better than ponzu!

[tears off paper revealing more ponzu]

Fumi : boom

Ichie : [gasping] More

Fumi : get the fuck out of my house

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Misora : What is the one thing I told you not to do

Aruru : burn the dorm down

Misora : And what did you do?

Aruru : Made you dinner

Misora :

Aruru :

Misora :

Aruru : and burnt the dorm down

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Meifan : Well fuck me if I'm wrong but-

Yachiyo : You're wrong.

Meifan : wha-

Yachiyo : YOU'RE WRONG

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Akira : [calling Meifan on phone] I just had a nightmare

Meifan : [in sleepy voice] But Akira-san, it's 3 in the morning

Akira : in that dream Michiru was taller than me

Meifan : Do you need me to go there?

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Claudine : I bet you can't make a sentence without the letter 'a'

Hikari : You thought you just did something didn't you? Well to burst your bubble, numerous sentences could be constructed without using the first letter of the English lexicon.

Claudine :

Claudine : whot the fuck

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Tamao : Guys I'm taking my crush out

Rui : [forcing a smile] Congratulations!

Ichie : Wow congrats! When?

Tamao : Depends. [smiling to Rui] When are you free?

Rui :

Rui : holy shi-

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Waitor : What drink would you like to order, Miss?

Lalafin : I yearn for the tears of our enemies wrenched from their bodies as their bones are crushed within my grasp.

Shizuha : I'll have a milkshake.

Lalafin : Ooh, milkshake. I'll get that one too.

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Yachiyo : *gently taps table*

Meifan: *taps back*

Shiori : What are they doing?

Michiru : Morse code.

Yachiyo : *aggressively taps table*

Meifan : *slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-

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Interviewer : Hi! Welcome to our show. And you are?

Karen : hungry

Hikari : Who am I?

Mahiru : exhausted

Nana : a banana

Kaoruko : beautiful

Futaba : short

Maya : a queen

Claudine : la star!

Junna : the only normal person in this group, nice to meet you

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Yuyuko : With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.

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Aruru : I did a lot of dumb stuff

Misora : I am the victim of the dumb stuff

Shizuha : I recorded the dumb stuff

Lalafin : I joined Aruru in the dumb stuff

Tsukasa, screaming : AND I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!

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Michiru, teaching Meifan to get her license : Okay! You're driving and a lady and her dog are walking on the road. Quick, what do you hit?

Meifan : THE LADY!

Michiru : THE BRAKES .

-

Shiori, in a Chariot mood : I WOULD HAVE KILLED FOR YOU!

Michiru : THAT'S EXACTLY THE PROBLEM!

-

Michiru : Yachiyo, what is this?

Yachiyo : Oh, it's my to-do list.

Michiru : Really? I'm glad you are starting to be-

Michiru :

Michiru : This just says 'Fumi-senpai'

-

Michiru : Michiru is not doing too well.

Michiru : Michiru has this headache that comes and goes.

Akira : *walks in*

Michiru : There it is again

-

Michiru : Don't get me wrong, I love the Edels.

Michiru : It's just hard to control them someti- YACHIYO PUT SHIORI DOWN THIS INSTANT!

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Tamao : Here you are, Hanayagi-san. Nice hot cup of coffee

Kaoruko : Oh it's cold

Tamao : nice cup of coffee

Kaoruko : It's horrible!

Tamao : cup of coffee

Kaoruko : It's not even coffee

Tamao : cup

-

Rui : Are you sure we can leave them like that?

Futaba : Yep, don't worry.

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Fumi and Shiori : [fighting]

Claudine : can I get a waffle?

Fumi and Shiori : [fighting intensifies]

Claudine : can I please get a waffle?

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Junna: Looks like we're onto Plan B.

Lalafin: Technically, this would be Plan L.

Yuyuko: How many plans do we have? Is there even a Plan Y?

Meifan: Well, Rui-san dies in Plan Y.

Yuyuko: I like that. Let's go with Plan Y.

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~ The Procyons are lost ~

Misora: [calling on phone] It's alright, calm down. Can you tell me what you can see right now?

-

Mahiru: There is a bank, a bakery and a sign which says Starira... (hopeful case)

Ichie: I can see the blue sky, pretty flowers and a giant tree! (hopeless case)

Aruru: I see a bright future ahead with you on my side... (????)

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Yachiyo : If you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be?

Shizuha : Maybe tipsy?

Maya : Drunk.

Michiru : Wasted.

Nana : Dead.

Tsukasa : PEOPLE,  WE'RE UNDERAGE.

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Karen : Hikari-chan, What time is it?

Hikari : I don't know; pass me that saxophone and we'll find out

Hikari : *plays saxophone loudly and extremely out of tune*

Akira : *slams Hikaren's door* WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING

Hikari : It's 2 AM

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Yakumo : Right I've got good news

Suzu : Are we having a new event of our own?

Koharu : New Seiran cards added?

Hisame : She said good news, not a miracle.

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Mahonee : I was arrested for being too cool.

Mimorin : The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.

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Tamao : Hanayagi-san!!

Kaoruko : What?

Tamao : Look I made this friendship bracelet for you

Kaoruko : You know, I'm not a jewellery person

Tamao : Um, you don't have to wear it-

Kaoruko : No I'm going to wear it forever. Back off.

-

Rui : Are you sure we can leave them like that?

Futaba : Yep. Don't worry.

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Fumi : Right, Shiori. Tell us what whipped is in two words.

Shiori : Saijou Claudine.

Claudine, quickly looking away from Maya : I literally breathed.

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Meifan, Lalafin, Yuyuko: *screaming*

Junna: *runs into the room* What's wrong Tanaka-san?!

Lalafin: Wait, why are you asking Yuyuko that when Meifan and I are also here?

Junna: Because Tanaka-san wouldn't scream unless it's an emergency. You two scream whenever you have the chance.

 

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Ichie: Mahiru-chan, we're hungry!

Misora: Mahiru-senpai! What's for dinner?

Aruru: We're hungry, Mahiru-chan!

Mahiru, frying a bottle of ketchup over the stove: *screams*

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Shizuha: Guys, I think we’re kind of missing something.

Yachiyo: Cohesion?

Maya: Teamwork?

Tsukasa: A general sense of what we’re doing?

Nana: And Michiru-chan is not here.

Tsukasa: Oh, and that, yeah.

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Karen: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me.

Hikari: But they said not to touch the masterpieces.

Karen: Well somebody's got to pin the artwork to the wall.

Akira, on a walkie talkie: This is Yukishiro, those idiots are fucking around in the East wing again.

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Suzu : I told Koharu her ears flush when she lies.

Hisame : Why?

Suzu : Look.

Suzu : Koharu! Do you love us?

Koharu, covering her ears : No.

Hisame :

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Futaba: What’s it like being tall?

Ichie: Is it nice?

Michiru: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?

Shizuha, thinking of someone: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb four chairs, two boxes, a small coffee table, and six oddly placed stools to get what they want.

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Nossan : Who is your best friend?

Kudoharu : Aiba-san.

Nossan : *sad face*

Kudoharu : You didn't ask which friend you love the most

Nossan : okay so which friend do you lo-

Kudoharu : Aiba-san.

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Claudine : You look nice. I want to kiss you

Maya : What?

Claudine : I SAID IF YOU DIED I WON'T MISS YOU

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Tamao : I think Rui-chan is in love with me

Yuyuko : Congratulations. You're the last person to know.

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~ All Frontier members are adults ~

Tsukasa : Come on, I wasn't that drunk last night.

Misora : You were flirting with Shizuha-senpai.

Tsukasa : So what? She's my girlfriend.

Misora : You asked her if she was single.

Tsukasa :

Misora : And then you cried when she said she wasn't.

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Computer: Please enter a password.

Meifan: *types in 'Shiori'*

Computer: Your password is too weak.

Meifan: How fucking DARE YOU-

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Hisame: I think I need a hug...

Suzu: Good thing I'm hug shaped!

*45 minutes later*

Hisame: You... you can let go now.

Suzu: No, I absolutely cannot.

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Elle : Both of you, please shake hands

Kaoruko and Andrew : [shake hands]

*a second later*

Kaoruko : [immediately cleans and sanitises her hands]

Andrew : [removes the plastic covering on his hands and burns them]

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Someone : [flirts with Shiori]

Fumi : [stares silently]

Tamao : ... You're relatively quiet today, Fumi.

Fumi : No one plans a murder out loud, Tamao.

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Shizuha: Aruru-chan, what do you have?

Aruru: A KNIFE!

Shizuha: Okay, have fu-

Misora: NO!

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Shiori: Yesterday, I overheard Meifan-senpai saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and Yachiyo-senpai replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.

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Suzu : You lying, cheating, piece of shit!

Hisame : Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD

Suzu : I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING KOHARU WITH ME

Koharu, picking up the Monopoly board : I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

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Hikari: Kaoruko, are you good at maths?

Kaoruko: Hm? What's the question?

Hikari: When you cut a cake into 3 pieces, a piece becomes 1/3 of a cake, right?

Kaoruko: Yep.

Hikari: But 1/3 = 0.33333.... isn't it?

Hikari: What happens to the left-over 0.0000....1?

Kaoruko: That's simple, Kagura-han. It's on the knife you used to cut the cake.

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Fumi: I jokingly told Tamao and the others that I'll be leaving Rinmeikan on the 30th of February. They were crying until they realised that the 30th of February does not exist.

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Misora: A kid in front of us wanted to buy herself a snack but was 50 yen short, which made her cry. Aruru, who was watching it, grabbed a 50 yen coin from her pocket. She then handed it to the kid acting as if she just picked it up, saying, "This fell off from you."

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[Edel's Chatroom]

GoldenHamster: come on Yachiyo just admit it already

Fashionista: 什么 (what)

GoldenHamster: you're always like this aren't you? I didn't allow you to learn chinese so you can get away from your responsibilities as a finance manager

Fashionista: 我什么都不知道 (I know nothing)

GoldenHamster: gosh

GoldenHamster: @GachagaSuki

GoldenHamster: translate what she's saying will you?

GachagaSuki: huh? why should I?

GoldenHamster: 1000 yen if you do it

GachagaSuki: come on @Fashionista say something

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Junna: Right, I've got two bananas and you've got four. If I ask you to give me one, how many bananas do you have now?

Nana: Six!

Junna: I told you to give not take!!

-

Tamao: Ichie, say that you have four bottles of ponzu and you give one of them to Fumi. How many bottles of ponzu do you have left?

Ichie: Three.

Tamao: Oh, are you actually giving it to her?

Ichie: Nope, I'm drinking it in front of Fumi. My stomach might suffer, but I'll manage.

Tamao:

-

Lalafin: Misora, you have seven bags of furikake. If I ask you to pass me three bags how many do you have left?

Misora: Six.

Lalafin: Six? Not four?

Misora: Because I just finished one bag.

Lalafin:

Misora: Five.

Lalafin: Stop, STOP

-

Shiori: Yukishiro-senpai, if you had five boxes of tea and I ask you for one-

Akira: Zero.

Shiori: Huh?

Akira: Since you like them a lot, you can take every one of them.

-

Suzu: Koharuuu, say that you have nine chocolates and you give me three of them. How many will you have?

Koharu: Nine.

Suzu: But you hate chocolate!

Koharu: Nine.

Suzu: 🥺